Did you know that 1 in 4 couples sleep in separate beds?1

Despite this common experience, many people continue to feel a lot of stigma around speaking out about their need for a restful night’s sleep – which may mean sleeping in a different room from your lover.

People tend to learn that there must be something wrong with a relationship if a couple is sleeping in separate beds.

There is a term for sleeping in separate beds that contributes to this learned stigma: “Sleep divorce.” This term implies that sleeping apart is a sign of a relationship lacking in love and sex.

But what if you continue to sleep in the same bed with restless night’s sleep? Does your relationship improve or deteriorate? Are you more snappy and short with your partner the next day because their snoring kept you awake? Or maybe you feel a missing desire for your partner because you’re the one waking with the baby all the time.

I invited RENEE REINA, Ph.D. in Psychology and host of the top-ranking parenting podcast “THE MOM ROOM” to break through the stigma and talk about prioritizing sleep and continuing to nurture our relationships. Listen to Renee's progression of their relationship and sleep HERETUNE INTO OUR EPISODE TOGETHER on Mom Room about resentment and relationships

In this episode, we discuss:

  • Renee’s community’s surprising response to her disclosure of sleeping in separate rooms
  • Early messaging around parents not sharing beds
  • The relationship progression she experienced in terms of bed sharing and sleeping with her partner
  • When sleeping in separate beds works – and when it doesn’t
  • Prioritizing and making choices to nurture her relationship


  1. 2017 National Sleep Foundation Survey

"Such a fantastic compilation of well curated interviews and ideas to support relationships! You will walk away with concrete ideas and big shifts to help your marriage. The podcast beautifully compliments her membership for anyone living in a pandemic and also married." - Drsfe

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About the Show

I'm Not Your Shrink is a podcast aimed at helping you feel connected to yourself, to others, and to live a life aligned with what matters most to you. I bring you clinical knowledge and evidence based research, along with experiences of sitting in the therapist chair along with being a wife and mother. I'm joined by subject matter experts to talk about everyday issues we all face to change the dialogue in your life.